Cookie's Fortune

I was having Pho at this Vietnamese restaurant last night and I tried to open the fortune cookie. When it comes to luck, I often end up having quite a few scores to settle with my stupid stars. This time yet again my reputation (and my clumsiness) preceeded me and I dropped the misfortune cookie on the floor, shattering it. The fortune read, 'You will meet someone special at a social gathering". Now this would have been a great one if I had opened it myself. But technically it was the grimy floor that opened it. Now all I can do is to hope with a heavy heart that the floor finds a good carpet at a vacuum cleaner sale. Hmph. These people who write stuff that go inside these cookies are so unimaginative. It is disappointing each time I open a cookie with great enthusiasm, only to find some cliche like "Opportunity is knocking on your front door". I always think they should put in more peppy stuff like "You will spill your desert on your dress." "The gelatinous thing in your soup is the waiter's saliva." or maybe they should give relationship advice like "Your boyfriend is too dorky for you" "Try to get lucky with the waitress" "Cheapskate, take your girlfriend to a better restaurant" . These places serve terrible food as it is, and then they top it up with a good serving of a pungent bromide in your fortune cookie. With snappy messages, they could spice up your day at the very least. The rear side of these cookies should also be put to better use. Who ever would remember the chinese word for "Sun" that they read at a restaurant, when feeling flatulent and bloated. Rather they should teach guys to hit on girls in chinese. Now that is something guys will remember. The other reason I hate fortune cookies is because I feel disappointed when I eat them. They taste like ice-cream cones, only without the ice-cream and then I feel like eating ice-cream. But then, ice-creams at Asian restaurants invariably taste like trash. All the cheer that the prophesy inside the cookie instilled in me gets neutralized by the bad taste from the artificial flavors in the ice-cream. I suggest these people serve chocolate cakes with interesting messages inscribed on them with icing. Now that would make my day!!! Hope this ones make yours.